February 10, 2012
(Typed on my phone after my first appt at the Cleveland Clinic)
I'm on lunch with nothing to do so I thought I'd tap out a little something to organize my thoughts. This week has been so insanely crazy. Both in a good way and in a bad way. Good in that I got a job offer for a position I'm really excited about and in that I'll be teaching my first Zumba class on Saturday. Bad in that I have to wait until Monday to find out what is going on inside of my head. Of course me being me, I've been obsessing over the whole thing and dreaming up the most ridiculous scenarios. It's weird--part of me wants nothing to be wrong (although since I'm deaf in one ear I suppose something already is) and the other part of me wants this MRI to find something so I have some sort of answer as to why I lost my hearing in the first place.
The waiting is the worst part. Especially since I feel that the doctor was a bit cryptic and mysterious about the entire thing. I mean is it a tumor or isn't it? She told me not to worry about it because it was so small on the MRI it could just be fluid or inflammation,. But when I was getting ready to leave she told me to bring along a family member to my next appointment so I can discuss my treatment options. I think it was just her way of keeping me calm since I was alone and completely unaware of the situation.
I'm still a little ticked the OSU doctor that I saw back in 2007 didn't pick up on it in the first place. In fact, he didn't even really review the MRI and left me thinking this whole time that strep throat caused my hearing loss. Well, I finally did a little research on my own (five years too late) and I have yet to find anything that states that strep can cause hearing loss.
I find it interesting though that this has all happened. I mean the only reason I went up to the Cleveland Clinic was to see about getting a hearing aid. I had no idea there was the possibility of me having a BRAIN TUMOR!. I would have never gone back to an ENT for my ear otherwise. The case was closed as far as I was concerned. Strep throat had caused irreversible hearing loss in my right ear and that was that.
We'll see what the MRI has to say on Monday. I was originally getting it done in March in Cleveland but I couldn't wait that long for answers. I would've totally driven myself crazy in the meantime....much like I'm doing right now.
I'm on lunch with nothing to do so I thought I'd tap out a little something to organize my thoughts. This week has been so insanely crazy. Both in a good way and in a bad way. Good in that I got a job offer for a position I'm really excited about and in that I'll be teaching my first Zumba class on Saturday. Bad in that I have to wait until Monday to find out what is going on inside of my head. Of course me being me, I've been obsessing over the whole thing and dreaming up the most ridiculous scenarios. It's weird--part of me wants nothing to be wrong (although since I'm deaf in one ear I suppose something already is) and the other part of me wants this MRI to find something so I have some sort of answer as to why I lost my hearing in the first place.
The waiting is the worst part. Especially since I feel that the doctor was a bit cryptic and mysterious about the entire thing. I mean is it a tumor or isn't it? She told me not to worry about it because it was so small on the MRI it could just be fluid or inflammation,. But when I was getting ready to leave she told me to bring along a family member to my next appointment so I can discuss my treatment options. I think it was just her way of keeping me calm since I was alone and completely unaware of the situation.
I'm still a little ticked the OSU doctor that I saw back in 2007 didn't pick up on it in the first place. In fact, he didn't even really review the MRI and left me thinking this whole time that strep throat caused my hearing loss. Well, I finally did a little research on my own (five years too late) and I have yet to find anything that states that strep can cause hearing loss.
I find it interesting though that this has all happened. I mean the only reason I went up to the Cleveland Clinic was to see about getting a hearing aid. I had no idea there was the possibility of me having a BRAIN TUMOR!. I would have never gone back to an ENT for my ear otherwise. The case was closed as far as I was concerned. Strep throat had caused irreversible hearing loss in my right ear and that was that.
We'll see what the MRI has to say on Monday. I was originally getting it done in March in Cleveland but I couldn't wait that long for answers. I would've totally driven myself crazy in the meantime....much like I'm doing right now.
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