February 16, 2012

I'm finally starting to settle a bit about this whole tumor thing. Last night was the first night in quite some time that I was able to actually sleep pretty soundly. Not that I received great news yesterday. It turns out I do in fact have a 1.3cm tumor and have to have surgery to remove it. I think it's just the fact that now that I know exactly what's going on with me and have a treatment plan I can rest a bit easier. Now I know what to expect. I don't have to make random speculations anymore about what may or may not happen which is comforting. Of course surgery brings with it its own bag of goodies. But thanks to my age, the tumor's small(er) size and my good health, things should progress fairly smoothly. At least I pray so.

I won't go into all the details here about what an acoustic neuroma is. I am by no means an expert on the subject and you'd be much better off simply Googling "acoustic neuroma" or "vestibular schwannoma." The Acoustic Neuroma Association's website is also a good place to start. Simply put, an acoustic neuroma is a benign, slow growing tumor that forms on the 8th cranial nerve--the nerve that connects the ear to the brain. As it grows, this tumor affects a person's hearing, balance, and facial muscles as the nerves which control these three things are all bundled together and travel through the internal auditory canal. Here's what mine looks like:

It's pretty obvious but in case you're having difficulty locating it,  it's that bright white spot on the left side of both images.

Thankfully, mine is still on the smaller end as far as acoustic neuromas go so hopefully that means an easier removal with less complications.

Part of me is, understandably, terrified and another part of me, not so understandably, is a little excited. I know, weird. But stuff like this really fascinates me and the fact that acoustic neuromas are so rare to begin with (1 in 100,000) makes it even more interesting. I asked my dad if he thought I could get a video of the surgery but he seemed pretty doubtful. I mean if someone's going to drill a hole in my head I at least want to see it.

So anywho, that's where we are right now. I put in a call to the Cleveland Clinic to set up an appointment with my doctor and the neurosurgeon to further discuss the surgery and set a date. I'm hoping to get it scheduled for some time in March, the earlier the better. I applied for a job that I'm really hoping to get and the woman currently holding the position is leaving in March. Since there's a month long recovery period I need to be sure that I'll be up and active in time to take over the position if I do end up getting it.

Sadly, it does look like I won't get the chance to perform in Chicago in April. I just don't see how I would be recovered in time to be able to do all the dancing that the show requires. Even more so since rehearsals start at the end of March. Who knows though. Maybe I can assist with costumes.